Memphis tours is picking us up from the hotel at 2pm so the kids and Leanne enjoy the day relaxing in the room in our own sort of self-quarantine while Kyle works by the pool on the unenviable task of cancelling the last 2 months of the trip and trying to recover whatever prepaid money he can.  

The pool has yellow tape with the words “caution, do not enter” around its perimeter preventing people from swimming but we witness one brave, er maybe stupid, swimmer in the pool.  When there is a water-borne virus pandemic going around, you’re probably best to follow the caution, do not enter advice.  

Leanne visits the hotel lobby’s jewelry shop to negotiate some final purchases from salesman Yassar. It’s her fourth time there which she is kind of embarrassed about even admitting in this blog.  A little stress shopping, perhaps? 

Sometimes those that serve us are a bit more explicit than others that they expect a tip. Imin, our housekeeper, is right up there with the best of them.  Yesterday, Imin knocked on our door several times to see if we are ready to have the room cleaned.  Each time he asks Leanne if we are checking out today and she tells him, “no, tomorrow.”  Subsequent he also says four times as he waits expectantly, “I’m not going to be here tomorrow.”  Leanne has learned this is tourism code speak for “you aren’t seeing me tomorrow when you would normally have to tip me so you might as well take care of it now and no, I don’t take Visa.”  After the fourth hint, Leanne pulls out a $20 which seems to appease him. “When are we leaving Egypt again?” Leanne can’t help but wonder. 

As Leanne walks back to her room from the Jewelry store, she runs into Imin from Housekeeping. “Didn’t he tell me four times yesterday that he was off today?” Leanne thinks to herself. Before she could even ask why he’s in when he was to be off.  “Ah, mom, I am off Tomorrow not today, my bad.”  “You ain’t getting another $20,” Leanne proactively shuts down any further attempts at wrangling more money out of her.

Meanwhile, Kyle goes to the hotel gift shop to get stamps to mail his postcards.  He wheels in his bag and asks for the stamps.  This is the actual conversation that really happened..

Clerk: “You’re leaving?”

Kyle: “Yes”

Clerk: “Why are you leaving?”

Kyle: “Well, um…”

Clerk: “It’s not because of the Coronavirus, is it?”

Kyle: “Well, actually it is”

Clerk: Is that dumb president of yours making you go back?”

Kyle: “Well, actually, no he’s not”

Clerk: “You do know it’s fake, right?”

Kyle: “The Coronavirus is fake?”

Clerk: “Yes, there is no virus, it’s all fake”

Kyle: “If that’s true, the rest of the world seems to be pretty good at coordinating a worldwide pandemic hoax.”

Clerk: “How many people do you know what have it?”
Kyle: “Well, I don’t actually know of anyone”

Clerk: “SEE MY POINT!!!!! You don’t know anyone who has it because there is no Coronavirus. IT’S ALL FAKE”

At 2 pm, our Memphis Tours van comes to pick us up at the hotel. We are waiting in the van as the hotel, our driver and an Egyptian Tourist Police are congregating.  The driver gets back in the van and informs us that the Police have to clear us to go to the airport. 

It takes 15 minutes to clear this hurdle and it is clearly a first for us.  We have no clue why it takes so long or what was he checking for. 

To our surprise, the Egyptian Police Officer climbs into the front seat and the driver takes off for the airport.  It turns out that the police officer will escort us to the airport to ensure we are safe and nothing happens to us.  We ask if they do that for all tourists and are told, “no, only for Americans.” Geez.

There is super light traffic to the airport and even up to the terminal. We are the only passengers getting out. There is literally no one around but us. It looks closed at first glance. Our guide Reem is there to meet us in front of the airport. She’s all smiles as if she’s seeing her own family.  

Just 72 hours ago, she didn’t even know we existed in this great big world but we connected on a fun level and today she will navigate Cairo Airport for us. She is to ensure we are in fact getting the heck out of Egypt in the midst of this global pandemic.  Our little angel from Egypt who laughs at all our silly jokes.  

As we emerge from the taxi, her smile dissolves into a sad and serious look.  We can tell something bad has happened. Reem starts, “the Egyptian government just announced .... well ..... that all flights to and from Egypt .....(a pregnant pause) .....are cancelled indefinitely ..... (a full on labor pregnant pause). 

By this time, Kyle’s face drains of all color and looks like he’s giving birth.  

Reem continues, “.....starting on the 19th.”  “Frick. What date is it today?” thinks Leanne trying to quickly recall the date in a stressful moment of panic.  “Isn’t today the 19th? that’s after St. Patrick’s day and the Ides of March joke that was on my Instagram this morning,” She thinks as she fumbles for her phone and sees a huge 16 staring at her. March 16th. YES! - we are free to go!

Kyle nearly collapses with relief.  Leanne feared an airport closure just this morning and here it is happening.  Kyle jokingly accuses Leanne of talking it into existence.  We are just damn lucky they gave a couple days and not effective immediately as some other countries have done.

Cairo is the largest city in the Arab world and in Africa with a population of 28 million.  And we are here on a Monday at 3 pm, and it is a literal ghost town.  It’s absolutely and incredibly eerie and surreal being in one of the largest airports in the world and not seeing anyone save a handful of employees. 

We enter and we are pretty much the only passengers on the airport. No lines on Egypt Air’s 50 terminal check-in stations. We find one guy working and as Reem approaches the sole employee he starts shaking his head no a few times.  They exchange words in Arabic and it doesn’t look good from our perspective.  “What now? Oh geez. We’re screwed,”  thinks the ever-optimistic Leanne.  

Turns out it was only that we were a little late to get the bags checked in for the flight but he took them anyhow.  Thank goodness, as typically 2 hours of arriving before an international trip suffices? But maybe not so in Cairo? Maybe not so during a global pandemic.

We bid Reem farewell as she stands behind security looking wistfully at us as she waves goodbye.  We will likely be here last tour guests for a long time. The “in-season” ends in May and then there are normally few tourists in the offseason due to the extreme heat. 

We have the security line to ourselves and the shops are either empty or closed outright. In fact, We don’t even see another passenger until we reach out Gate F5. We wait impatiently by the gate.  We are not out of Egypt until we are out of Egypt. 

The departures board is flashing so many “Flight Cancelled” that it looks like the Egyptian Pyramids Light and Sound show from the other night.  On one hand, we want and empty flight to minimize the people we’re exposed to but on the other hand, if the flight is too empty, it risks getting cancelled. 

It turns out our flight is packed.  We’re not sure where all these people were in the terminal but they sure showed up in force on the plane. The seats together Kyle purchased for the family this morning didn’t seem to have gone through so we are mostly all separated and spread throughout the plane. A small price to pay if we can actually get out of Egypt.

We see more face masks besides ours than before but still a relatively small percent of the passengers. We settle into our seats and methodically wipe every surface including the belt and belt buckles. Masks, hand sanitizer and wipes have become a way of life for us.

Despite cancelling the rest of the Egypt tour, getting tickets that disappeared in the middle of the night and narrowly avoiding the Cairo airport closure, we have done it, we’ve pulled off the Great Escape out of Egypt!